I'm taking the challenge!

Installing a Husband

Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from _Boyfriend 5.0_ to _Husband 1.0_ and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under _Boyfriend 5.0_. In addition, _Husband 1.0_ uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as_ Romance 9.5 _and _Personal Attention 6.5,_ and then installed undesirable programs such as_ Budget 5.0_, Cigars_ 3.0_ and _Golf Clubs 4.1_. _Conversation 8.0_ no longer runs, and _Housecleaning 2._6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running _Nagging 5.3_ to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate


DEAR DESPERATE_,
First, keep in mind, _Boyfriend 5.0_ is an Entertainment Package, while _Husband 1.0_ is an operating system. Please enter command: _ithoughtyoulovedme.html_ and try to download _Tears 6.2_ and do not forget to install the _Guilt 3.0_ update. If that application works as designed, _Husband 1.0_ should then automatically run the applications _Jewellery 2.0_ and _Flowers 3.5. _ However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause _Husband 1.0_ to default to _Grumpy Silence 2.5_, _Happy Hour 7.0_ or _Beer 6.1_. Please note that _Beer 6. 1_ is a very bad program that will download the _Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta. _ Whatever you do, _DO NOT_ under any circumstances install _Mother-In-Law 1.0 _(it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.) In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the _Boyfriend 5.0_ program. These are unsupported applications and will crash _Husband 1.0_. In summary, _Husband 1.0_ is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking_ 3.0_ and Hot_ Lingerie 7.7. _
Good Luck!
Tech Support

Name My Kitten FINAL Round!

Final Round to vote for my kitten's new name... You can vote here:

http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/387878

Thanks!

My Birthday...

I'm off to a great start... 3 posts then I quit! I actually didn't want to just write to write so I decided to wait until I had something to say...

So my 31st (gasp!) bday was yesterday... Cannot believe I am that old! It was good... I never believe in "birthdays" it's always the "birthday weekend" so it actually began on Friday. I decided what I really wanted was a kitten this year. Troy said no more animals but I've been working on him to get a kitty for awhile. Finally, he said yes so I told him Friday I was going kitty hunting.

Willow and I went to the county pound and they only had about 4 cats (full grown) that could be adopted! I was in shock! I hadn't really decided that I had to have a kitten but I knew when I met the kitty which one was meant to be and I wasn't feeling any of them. Frustrated I was about to drive 40 mins back home when I realized we were right by Troy's office, so I called and told him we would come visit. On the way, I remembered the humane society was right near there but I couldn't remember how to get there and it was already 5pm so I wasnt sure when they closed. At Troy's office I quickly looked them up online for directions and ran back out the door.

We arrived at 6:15pm and the sign said they closed at 6:30pm, we ran in and said "we'll be quick" A nice worker came up and asked if we were looking for a kitty and if so what kind. I explained I wasn't really sure... I had hoped for a younger cat, I love persians and himalayans and prefer fluffy kitties. Right then I came upon 2 super fluffy adorable kittens (mane coon), the worker said I think you need to see these kittens here and pointed to the end cage, I hesitantly walked down there as I saw the kitty I wanted. She said the 2 kittens in this cage had fur like a rabbit, so soft and thick, faces like bobcats, eyes like owls, great personalities and were about 4 months old. I looked at 2 sleeping brown tabbies, nothing exciting... I was like ok, well the 2 down here are exactly what I want. She said "oh yeah them, they're for pets on parade". ???? Huh? Apparently they pick the most desireable pets and on Saturdays they have drawings for them. You need to be there when they open, put your name in, blah blah blah... I was like yeah I live an hour from here... Not happening... As cute as they were, there's plenty of other kitties that need homes without a fight for them!
In the cage right next to the 2 she had mentioned was a this teeny black and white kitten about 8 weeks old if that, SUPER fluffy, looked like a little fluffball. I asked to see him. As se was getting him out, the original 2 woke up and I saw their faces.... OMG! The worker was so right!!! They had the cutest round faces! I asked her to put fluffball back (after apologizing to him) and to see the female of the 2 she mentioned...
We took her into a meeting room and Willow was in love. The kitty tolerated Willow, purred the entire time, and was incredibly calm. I looked at the time, 6:40pm... said I'm sorry to keep you, she said it was fine and asked if I wanted to adopt her. She said she can go home tonight. I decided she was "the one" and began the papers....
On the way home I realized I didn't have a litter box, litter, etc... they gave me some food luckily. So Willow and I stop at PetSmart, pick up some toys, litter, litter box, bowls, more food and come home...
Troy finally meets the kitten and thinks she was a good choice. Daisy (the bulldog) wasn't so sure about her, nor was kitty towards Daisy, but there have been NO incidents thus far! I must say, it is amazing how easy this cat has fit into our household!
Saturday, I wasted most of the day doing nothing and trying to figure out what to do. Oh yeah, and think of names for kitty, which still is up in the air. So I finally went shopping then Troy met Willow and I for dinner at the chinese buffet (I'm for some reason obsessed with this place) and had dinner.
Sunday, my bday, slept in as usual till 11am... then was pissed at myself for sleeping so late like I am everyday. Then again spent the entire day trying to figure out what would make the "perfect day". Did I mention the entire weekend was gorgeous! Highs around 72! So, I again wasted a beautiful day doing nothing and finally decided that Troy has been wanting to bike ride and I have yet to even touch my amazing new bike so we should take a ride. Since we don't have a bike rack, we had no choice but to just ride around the neighborhood. It ended up being a really nice time, the weather was perfect and I quickly realized I hadn't ridden a bike in about 10 years! It took it's toll quikckly and about 30 mins later we were done. I then needed to take Daisy for her walk (I have kept that resolution!) and Troy agreed to come along... He pushed Willow in her new bike trailer/stroller (that FINALLY came from ebay on Sat) and I walked Daisy. Again, it was just nice to be out. Arriving home, I realized the last thing I felt like doing was cooking so Troy said let's go out... Now, I just bought $400 worth of stuff from costco the other day and here I am eating out again, but then I thought, its my bday I dont care!
I decided to try Filly's. It's a realy honky tonk restaurant/bar that I wanted to go to after Willow's baptism but they were rented for a private party. We went in and there was a band playing, not too loud, the bar was pretty crowded and we searched for a table. Looking at the menu, the food was not at all what I wanted... Lots of grease, but I picked a cheeseburger, Willow had chicken fingers, and Troy a taco salad. I added a dinner salad which was a few (and I mean FEW) pieces of iceberg lettuce and 4 slices of onion. This addition was $2! The cheeseburger was mediocre, nothing exciting. Oh yeah, we also had 5 jalapeno poppers for $6 which was average but still seemed high. Troy LOVED his taco salad and Willow liked hers, the chicken did look really good. But the total came to $48! It was overpriced especially for what you get. The service was friendly but hard to get ahold of when you need them. The band was good, country-ish and they had a little dance floor. Willow LOVED the music... people would come over to say hi to her and she would get pissed if they blocked her few of the band, on the way out she waved and waved to the band... looks like I have a future groupie! The atmosphere was awesome and I highly recommend it to tourists, especially if they want to see real cowboys, or at least people dressed like them. I think it would be a good place to go next time we have guests in town or just to have a few drinks, but not for the food.
After that good time, I was still hungry and wanted cake but not to end up with a cake at home so I decided I wanted to go to Coldstone Creamery. I had the Birthday Cake Remix and Troy had a dark chocolate ice cream, Willow shared. OH it was good! Hit the spot!
Then home it was... Turned out to be a good day, nothing too exciting. Now I have 1 week till my new job to get the mess I call a house in order and hopefully paint by bedroom, well see if I can do it!!!

*** Almost forgot! Troy and I can't agree on a name for kitty so I need your help! Please vote which name you like best for her. There's a pic of her at the top of the post!!! http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/382767 Thanks!!!*****

Troy's Resolution

Troy, the husband, told me he wanted to get me a bike for Xmas and kept asking me to pick one out. Well, I did some research and really wanted a bike exactly like my last one but couldn't find one and they cost about $500. Considering my history with bikes I thought I should go with a less expensive bike...

I remember Xmas 1989, wow I just realized that was 20 years ago now! Anyway, I received a purple 10 speed bike just what I wanted I was so excited I hurried up and got dressed and wanted to take a ride. My dad went outside with me to make sure I was ok and watched as I rode down the road. I was headed to my grandmother's who lived at the other end of the road, I turned halfway there and noticed my dad waving goodbye and going back into the house. Just then I blacked out and I remembered laying on the freezing pavement looking up at the cold gray sky. I'm not sure how long I laid there in the middle of the road, seeing it was Xmas morning no one was out. I tried to get up and realized that I had blood all over my hands, there was a pain shooting down my arm and my black sweatpants were torn and bloodied. My voice tried to call out for help but the sounds just wouldn't come. I finally realized I would have to get up and get help, I knew I couldn't make it home or to grandma's so I parked by bike and went to the closest house and knocked on the door. The girl that lived there was about 2 years younger than me. I knocked and she and her mother opened the door with shocked faces.... it took them a moment then finally said "Sarah?". I just cried and said "Can you please call my dad". They took me to their bathroom and began to dab a washcloth on my face. I could now see in the mirror why they looked so shocked opening the door. The skin on both cheeks had been scraped off, there was a rock embedded above my lip and a deep gash on my chin. I looked like something out of a cheesy 80s horror flick. I still can't imagine having some injured child stroll up to my Xmas festivities in the morning, I still feel bad about that to this day, but what was I do to? Anyway, my dad arrived very quickly and rushed me to an urgent care. It turned out my arm was fractured, I needed stitches above my lip but I protested them so much they said I could get away not having them. They bandaged my entire face and we were home by that afternoon. It was the first Xmas I missed family dinner at grandma's, I remember not showing my face for weeks, I would hide my face whenever anyone came to visit. It was terrible... I'm still not sure what happened... It could have been icy, a large rock, we think I went over the handlebars but I'll never know. After that I wouldn't ride the bike for a long time...

A few years later, again for Xmas my sister and I received bikes. This time they were Fuji hybrids; mine was fluorescent yellow. I loved that bike, I remember coming home from school some days putting it on the bike rack on the car and driving to the NCR trail. That was "my time". I would ride, smell the air, look at the trees, it felt amazing, I felt free. I tried to ride as much as possible so then when I moved to Miami and the bike stayed in MD I missed having it. As soon as I moved into my own apt and was able to bring the bike, I packed it up and drove it back against my parent's recommendations. I think I only had the bike a few weeks in Miami when one night I was sitting in my bedroom on the computer and I see a man scale the 8 foot privacy fence. He looks right at me, then right at the bike and goes straight for it. Granted I was stupid and placed it right outside my back door behind the washer and dryer unlocked. I get up once I realize what's happening, screaming and trying to get out the door... That stupid apartment you needed a key to unlock the doors and the key was in the front door so I couldn't get out. Which, now that I think about it is probably for the best. So instead I stand there in a t-shirt and underwear screaming my head off as I watch $500 and my bike love being thrown over the privacy fence.

So, now this Xmas Troy wants to get me a bike... I want one, but considering the history am a bit nervous. I test a few in stores, do a lot of research and my final pick is a Schwinn. Tonight we went out and picked it up. Troy's resolution is apparently for us to ride at least once a week so we'll see about that. We bought Willow a bike trailer over 2 weeks ago and I'm still trying to find out if the idiot has sent it yet or not. Nevermind, that's a sore subject right now, little mad at the seller...

Anyway, here's the bike... I'll keep you posted on how it rides and if any bad luck comes from this one ;)

http://www.target.com/dp/B000KZ4MI6/ref=cm_reviews_pg1?ie=UTF8&pf_rd_r=1DC4XKJBYXR36CC6GSTE&pf_rd_p=465354091&pf_rd_i=B000KZ4MI6&page=1&pf_rd_s=bottom-6&activetab=Guest%20Reviews&pf_rd_m=A1VC38T7YXB528&pf_rd_t=201